By Stefny! At the Disco
I have been struggling to process this since Wednesday and I think I’m finally ready (and have time) to write it down.
If you know anything about me – anything at all – you know that Brand New is my favourite band of all time. I’ve been listening to them since 2002, but they didn’t take over the #1 spot in my heart until Deja Entendu came out in 2003. I saw them live for the first time in July 2006 at La Zona Rosa and since that day have never gone more than 1-2 years without seeing them (aka every time they rolled through Austin).
After they released Science Fiction in 2017 and announced that tour, with the final stop in Dallas, I knew I had to be there. And I was.
And then… I thought it was the last show they’d ever play. How fortunate I was to be the last show.
Over the last 7+ years there have been many theories, guesses, and tinfoil hat moments, so when chatter picked up after Jesse’s LA fires benefit show, I dismissed them.
Then, while I happened to be on vacation in Portland (and one day after I karaoked “I Will Play My Game Beneath the Spin Light”) it happened. They announced three dates, the first of which was at The Bomb Factory in Dallas. The same place I last saw them. And a place I hadn’t been since.
It’s always been nuts trying to buy Brand New tickets but this time was like trying to get tickets to the Eras Tour. My anxiety was through the roof. But I secured two tickets.
So for the last 3 weeks, all I’ve thought about is this show. What was it going to be like? What would they play? What would they say? What was the crowd going to be like?
Fans started making friendship bracelets to trade at the show. Facebook groups were started to connect with others and make plans for before/after the show. Tattoo shops started doing flash sheets.
Leading up to the show, my best friend and I went to Westlake Brewery where a lot of fans were chilling before the show. We found my friend Paul (who I met at a Jesse Lacey solo show at Mohawk in 2008) and a new friend Tom (who flew in from Pittsburgh for the show). The line to get in was so long they actually opened doors 30 minutes early. We finally went in about an hour after doors opened and there were still so many people streaming in. We found our way to the merch line (which, btw, was the longest merch line I’ve ever seen in my entire life). They had one shirt and that was it, but everyone needed that shirt. It was like waiting in line at Six Flags or something, but we finally got up there. Some girl asked me if I could buy her two shirts and she’d give me $100 so I said sure. Got up there, secured the shirts, and then her partner actually Venmoed me $200. Met another new friend in the merch line, a guy from Dallas named Robert.
After merch, we got our drinks and Robert led us through the crowd to find his other friends.
When the lights dimmed and Brand New was walking out, I’ve never felt an emotion like that. I’m always excited to see them, but I was worried I was dreaming. Or something would happen and it wouldn’t really be them. Or something would happen and they wouldn’t actually play. There were so many scenarios running through my head. And then the opening notes of “The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows” started and it all became real. Immediately, the crowd of mostly elder emos started moshing. It was just like it always was.
They played a mix of songs from Deja Entendu on (poor, neglected YFW), ending with “Jesus Christ.” They played two songs from their most recent album Science Fiction for the first time. After one song, Jesse was visibly crying and had to compose himself, apologizing to the crowd. After another, he monologued about how nothing has ever compared to spending time with friends and family like music, and thanked us for allowing them to play for us.
You could also tell as the show went along that everyone got a little looser. Vin is a feral animal and went absolutely wild playing the guitar. He needed this. They all needed this.
Disappointingly, they did not do an encore. Most of the crowd stuck around. No one came out to strike the stage, the house lights weren’t on, the stage lights remained on, and the house music hadn’t come on. There was hope! Alas, those all eventually came to be. Someone around us speculated that it was a delay to give the band time to get back to the bus outside.
And then, it was over. The moment I had waited for for seven years (and knew was actually happening for three weeks) was over. I felt kind of empty. I was still on a high from the show, but eventually, it wore off. Especially the next day. And especially the next day.
I spent Friday during work watching livestreams of the show. The first one started and I immediately started crying. I didn’t mean to, I didn’t even know I was thinking about crying. It just happened. I watched the show twice from two different angles and lost track of how many times I cried. I cried to my therapist Friday night. And then after my appointment, I watched a livestream from that night’s show. Viewership bounced around from like 270 to almost 400 by the last song of the night. The chat was so much fun. We all felt the same way. The boys were a bit looser that night. Jesse straight up forgot to play a song once because he was too busy watching Vin have fun.
Saturday night, we were out at another event but it ended before the show started. I was able to livestream that one as well, although I couldn’t be as invested in it as we didn’t get home until later into the set. This was the final of their three shows, and it was in Jesse’s hometown of Nashville. He talked about how he moved his family there from New York and all he knew about it was country music. He didn’t know what an impact it would have on him. He talked about how many of his friends were in attendance. He talked about the ID checker at the door who mentioned how many NY IDs she’d seen. He got emotional again, and so did I.
At the end of the set, I swear Jesse said, “We were Brand New.” I don’t know if he means that they were Brand New tonight, if it was a slip of the tongue, or if he means that was it. I doesn’t feel like that was it. I can only hope it was the start of something. Their plan was always to end in 2018 but this just didn’t seem like the end. But I won’t be over here with my clown makeup on just yet.
edit 3/31/25: we are so back baby!